oubliette

about a year and a half ago i was sent to a remote location in the country by my parents to help me recuperate.

it wasn't just their decision, it was also mine.

i agreed to it because i have been victim to the actions of very sick people. i agreed to, because i needed time to recover, and most importantly, to forget.

i desperately needed to obliterate all memories of it.

at that time, my spirit was dying of depression, and gloom. all i could think of was hate, for all the people who tricked me, used me, let me down, and deceived me. how i imagined everyday that i could find a way to get back at them, for the inconceivable moral crimes they've commited. i was hurt something fierce.

i used to wake up each dawn all covered in sweat, because of nightmares.
i was going through severe emotional trauma.

every night i had to drink staggering amounts alcohol just to put me to sleep.

each moment i was alone, all i could think of were the things that happened to me. and that my heart and pride would undergo fits due to the hopelessness of my situation. i wanted payback, but i was incapable of doing it.

the place i was sent to was a countryside place. lots of trees. mountains. farms. the air you breath is free from pollution and you feel comfort as the breeze touches your skin. and you'll feel an inner peace.

there was one spot where i used to sit down and gaze at the clouds, begging salvation from the empty skies.

i found solace in that place. slowly, i began to forget. eventually, i started to lose my memories, good and bad. but there are some things i could never forget, for sure.

in time, i managed to bury every memory that needs to be hidden. i have already forgiven the actors too.

i won, in the end. i had the last laugh. and they sure as hell know and feel it. i already had my vengeance, and all i did was pass the time. i guess karma is a very powerful force.

i do believe that time heals all wounds, specially in my case.

oh how i wish i can go back to that place. a place so pure. so peaceful, so happy, so far away from evil. the perfect place to gather my thoughts.

the place of forgetting.
my oubliette.