speak the language

i was in the elevator with my buddy, headed down to get some food at the 24/7 store.

the lift wasn't too spacey, and there were a buncha people crammed with us inside. they were all okay, except for this one imbecile.

he was dressed with what looks to be a ridiculous ghetto-rappa-squat outfit. definitely not even close to what normal gangsta homies would wear.

and i'm like WTF? everybody's all dressed up to kill here, and here you are, actin' all gangsta and shi*.

i really don't care WTF anybody wears. it's them. if they're so into it, i mean...whatever gets you off, right?

NO.

i mean, it's absurd. it's the office man, there's these foreigners walking around, and there you are, tryin' to make a fool of yourself an' your country, and you don't know it.

the thing about him that is vexing me most is the way he speaks. i mean, sure, brother knows some slang, and that's how he wishes to communicate, but he ain't feelin', nobdody in the elevator ain't so hooked. he best get it together before i excommunicate him. i mean, we'd really appreciate it if he were to speak the language he knows real well. it's crazy, because he don't effin' speak english. damn right, that's why.

it's not just the clothes, bro, and it's not just the language. it's the culture. don't go about adopting a culture which you have zero knowledge of. c'mon, show some decency.

he uses "ain't" a lot, and he's dishing out "know what i'm sayin'?" after each sentence. like, blablabla, know what i'm sayin' this and blablabla, know what i'm sayin' that. that should be cool, but not with him! coz' he's got a heavy visayan accent to boot! visayan accent is cool, but just don't get it all mixed up with english. it's gonna make things worse. i mean, c'mon man, don't you think you're going way over your head just to impress them ladies in the lift? didn't you notice your friend was embarassed for you? know what i'm sayin'?!

an' don't effhin' look at me that way. i don't know you. i ain't got no beef with you.

he was staring me down because i was wearing my hoodie all the way up and he must've been wondering if i was also into this gangsta thing and if i could jam with him or somethin'. i ain't got no love for you, drone. go act a fool yo'self.

thing is, if you don't have the lot to back up your fetish for a certain culture, i just don't think it's right exaggerating yourself trying to act a fool just because you think it's cool. feel sorry for yourself. i do.

sure people think it's cool to listen to some hippie spew out all typesa slang , but there are limits. don't overdo it. you're only gonna get yourself in trouble. try calling an african american "my nigga", and you'll get yourself killed. i'd kill you on the spot, if i was one. that's what i mean.

i mean jesus, you best check yo'self before you wreck yo'self. lookit, lemme give ya'll wannabees out there the know-how on how ya get this shi* in execution. if you ain't no bro, ya best give some respeck, homes. if ya'll ain't in the know, ya'll should be damn ashamed o' yo'self goin' around acting crazy and shi*. coz you ain't got no flow, son. ain't nobody disrespectin' the bros. don't nobody mess up with no culture an' we all gone' be peaceful. ya know. nah das how you do shi*.

anyway, i'll give him credit for his effort. whatever acid trip you're on bra, you gots ta lay off the juice. i mean it.

this is serious shi*, bro. get them wraps and roll up.

get your act together, bra. grab yourself one of 'em shirts that says "i got my shi* together", shave that goatee, cut your hair, and then you go on ahead an' impress all them fine ladies. i don't care.

now go grab a date. stick out your one-inch bulky a** wallet and let out a loud one to the waiter.

"i got this". of course you do.

know what i'm sayin'?!

a whole new breed of rappin'.
a whole new breed of idiot.

jesus. this place don't ever run outta them kooks.